Jun. 30th, 2012

singindemonhq: (Default)
Minion Post.

People have tried to explain the dimensional portals to me in the past. They even gave us a training course with a lecture on it, once. The trouble was, the teacher started to use these fancy metaphors. For instance, she said,

“Imagine a spider web stretched out between the leaves in a mixed flowerbed. Imagine the myriad gossamer strands radiating out from the central circle, with every strand leading to a different place. That should give you some idea of a Nexus. Now picture the cross-bracing silk, stretching between the strands, making junctions with them all.”

There was a huge depiction of a dew-sprinkled spider-web on the wall-sized screen behind her, but I could have envisaged that quite clearly anyway; it was pretty. I would have thought the others could have imagined it, too. Then she said,

“Now watch the spider, racing from strand to strand down the junctions. That’s how...”

The Nimwellian freaked right out. He hates bugs. He got one in his mask once and made more fuss than he did when that crazy banshee hit him with a cudgel!

When the lecture started again they switched the screen off and she started telling us to, "picture a closed book - all the pages separate but lying pressed together. Imagine that you could simply step from one page to the next, from one story to another, from story to song to drama … "

Well, fine. I’ve seen books. I’ve read books, (though not lately.) I could picture it. By the time she’d got to, “moving through one book to the next” I was imagining a kind of binge-eating bookworm, but I’m not like the Nimwellian, that didn’t bug me at all.

My problems started when she tried to explain about “Keys”. Apparently some types try to open portals with blood. I think she said that leads to the portals or the dimensions dissolving into each other, or something – I don’t know: I could imagine the blood soaking stickily into the pages and the clotting making them attach and I got nauseous. (I do not like blood. “No blood” was specified when I first registered with “MinionsRUs”; the Master mostly toasts them so it isn’t usually a problem, here.) Anyway, that took us both out of the lecture and the third minion is kind of new.

So, I know how to use the Portals but I don’t know much about how they work.

I don’t think anyone reckoned on humans deciding that the portals are a great source of free energy and making those splintered-light variations. I hope we won’t have problems with those again, I don’t think the Master liked it.

Velociraptors can’t sing worth a damn.

Muse; “Sweet” the singing demon.
Fandom, BtVS
Words, 449

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